If you oppose abortion, the criticism of misogyny is an inevitable one. And if you are a male, and a believer, you fit the bill of the perfect misogynist. From my side of the fence, as someone who is anti-abortion, I would say that accusations of misogynism deflect attention from the real issue, and buy a bit of time for pro-abortionists because the great, woman-hating, bastard who opposes the ‘right to choose’ has to spend time apologizing for even having the temerity to hold a cogent opinion about abortion.
As a perfect misogynist, I will say the following, and you can question my motives if you like, but here it is. Contrary to what women may believe, men do not spend their time plotting against them, probably because we are too busy thinking of higher things like football. Furthermore, as a father and husband, I appreciate, although don’t fully understand, the intense pain women go through at certain stages of both their pregnancy and in time after birth.
Most importantly, whatever about the pangs of child-birth and child-bearing, the fact is that a pregnancy, no matter how difficult, can never be undone. As long as the Sun keeps rising, men and women will seek companionship with one another, they will lie with one another, and women will get pregnant. Women then face a choice about whether to keep or dispose of their child, a choice greatly influenced by the man who impregnated her, and whether he wants to stand by her or not (which, oddly, doesn’t make those men misogynists).
There is a major misconception about the nature of this choice. When a woman aborts a baby, she is not walking backwards to a point in time when she was not pregnant. No, she is taking a decision that is irreversible and is possibly (there are many case-studies) stepping into a permanent life-sentence of guilt and regret.
While this consideration doesn’t form the basis of my own personal opposition to abortion – my opposition is based on considerations about balancing the rights of two living human beings – it is the reason why someone like me can’t be accused of being a woman-hater. Choosing to abort isn’t a ‘free lunch,’ in emotional terms, but has the potential to be an intensely scarring experience, and promoting abortion means lumping many women with something worse than birth-pains. Rarely do we hear women saying “I regret giving birth.” Often we hear women expressing deep regret about aborting their baby because many women know that they took a rash decision, one facilitated by health services and pro-abortion institutions.
Pregnancy is a natural state for women to be in, pregnant women deserve the full support of everyone, we shouldn’t be trying to hide the miracle of child-birth, and we definitely shouldn’t claim that we show our love for women by encouraging them to dispose of live humans they are bearing into medical waste bags.